Plot Twist!

Looks like we won't be heading to surgery after all next weekend....  Harv's CEA is higher than it was last month and it looks like one of the tumors (which has increased a little bit in size) in his right side is too close to an important vein for surgery. There needs to be a bit more margin.

Dr. Park said that there's no reason to be discouraged but Harv needs to attack those tumors with some strong stuff before Dr. Park will feel okay about surgery.  If he were to do the surgery and get too close to the vein -- perhaps damaging that vein -- it could lead to liver failure. We're not really into the idea of liver failure.

So we will wait to hear from Dr. Lin about the next steps. Dr. Park thinks there should be some stronger chemo than the Xeloda, but he's the surgeon, not the oncologist. We'll see what Dr. Lin's thoughts are.  

Truthfully, I was disappointed and sad when we heard the news. I am so dang ready to move outta this treatment phase.  But, I certainly don't want to risk liver failure.  

I've discovered that when we go to the doctor and we hear news that I don't love, I have to process for a little while -- without discussing -- and then I get to the "let's kick this cancer in the butt" phase. 

I'm tired. I keep wanting normal. The "normal" I keep thinking about is about two years old or older. We aren't there anymore.  Oh, how I long to be able to embrace what is instead of longing for what was! That'd be a good prayer.

And so, we wait for further instructions. We are currently enjoying a visit from my sister and her boys. And, tonight, we are indulging in our SECOND trip to Mallard Ice Cream this week -- topped off with a happy viewing of "Napoleon Dynamite."  

We will find out soon what our next steps are. And, I will ride my bike in a few weeks to help doctors and researchers discover ways to make cancer disappear.

Many blessings to you all. You are all truly a blessing to us.