I struggle.

I struggle with being what everybody needs me to be. I struggle with providing delicious, nutritious food that actually tastes good to people other than ME. I continue to struggle with my unsatisfied need for space and alone time while still loving my family like they need me to love them. I continue to grieve "the way things were" before cancer knocked on our door.

And yet, I know that I can't go back.

So, my real desire -- and real struggle -- is to accept what IS instead of longing for what was. Even though cancer sucks, I KNOW that there have been and will continue to be blessings in the midst of it all. 

I'd like to notice those more often.

And learn to love my life EXACTLY as it is RIGHT THIS MOMENT.