Insecurity

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made... (Psalm 139:14)

I am who I am.

Some days “homemaker” may mean that the activities of my day are less than exciting….carpools to drive, shopping to do, bathrooms to clean, laundry to fold, dog to walk, meals to plan and prepare, travel plans to be made, sports to watch, recitals to attend, bedtimes to meet. When people ask what I’ve been doing, I report “not much,” but the truth is I run a household. And, I am able to do that without totally stressing myself out. Some people like to fill their days with lots of things. I like my days to be less full. This is my life. I’ve been given the gift of being a homemaker as a full-time job. The “boring little details” of my life aren’t very exciting to report, but that is what I do.

It’s also true that I’m not very adventurous. Don’t put me in skis. Don’t make me climb a mountain or sail the ocean. Don’t make me swim in water that might have animals in it. And, please don’t make me walk on a trail while listening to coyotes howl in the background.

I live in a part of the country that is populated by outdoor enthusiasts. I love the outdoors, but from a safe vantage point. I love the IDEA of seeing a cougar or a bear, but from the safety of my house or car. I love the IDEA of fishing for dinner, but please don’t make me put on the bait or take the fish off the hook after I catch it and please don’t make me clean it. Surely there are others like me. But the people I run into are the ones who are taking full advantage of our AMAZING surroundings. I watch nature from my deck or from a safe little walk in the park.

How do I learn to accept that THAT is who I am? I don’t HAVE to be just like other people. There was some reason why I was created this way.